I said I was gonna list all the things that I loved, there is so many millions of things that I do love it would take forever, so I was gonna just post the things I love about that particular day when I had the time to post.
I have found I do not have the time to post very often.
I do love all my kids, my daughter, my family, my friends, (new & old) and I love the gospel and the scriptures and I do love my life.
Well parts of it anyway.
I don't want to be negative, but it the negative things I do talk about because I need to talk about them. Maybe get feed back from others who may or may not be going through or have gone through the same things.
So here it goes, the latest of things, i am not so in love with.
I am so fat.
that is not a latest fact, but in this new house I have a mirror in my bathroom. it tells the truth. In my old house there was no such mirror and I could avoid seeing the "whole" me.
Sometimes the truth sets you free and sometimes it just hurts.
I am officially (not that it makes any difference official or not, I am just saying it out loud)... I am over 100lbs over weight.
Ugh.
How do I even begin to fix this problem?
Since it isn't an immediate health issue, like diabetes or... well you get it.... and don't misunderstand what i am trying to say but usual forget my whole point, i know it could turn into a problem.
I AM NOT STUPID.
i don't even know where to start.
yes, eat healthy.
yes, exercises.
I AM SO TIRED FOR LACK OF SLEEP, it is honestly the last thing i wanna do.
i am also on a very tight budget, thanks Arnold)
***********side note - i am typing with one hand because Michael is screaming if i don't hold him. so please forgive the non-capitalized letters*********
i have to be very thrifty with my money and that doesn't always mean i can have a fresh fruit salad everyday.
i have way too many more excuses....
sometimes i wish i had a heath issue to help me get motivated.
i did by a jogger/stroller from my sister. (more like traded it....oh Ashley, the dog chewed on it so she changed her price and i could not resist)
when i am stressed i bake. then i eat what i bake and then lose all self control. i bake good stuff. better than most.
i am hungry more because of the nursing.
and i am depressed.
which makes me fat, which makes me depressed.
a vicious cycle.
so exercise and trying to eat better, more water, is my plan. now if i can only get
the energy to start.
my kids had a physicals/ check ups lately and they found some things out.
Nathan is considered over weight. Matthew was at this age too and then he grew. I am not worried.
Caleb is normal. He is exactly where he is suppose to be at age 9 for a boy.
Matthew has a heart murmur. his elevated blood pressure caused an enough concern in his Dr. that we are scheduled to see a Pediatric Cardiologist, just to make sure.
Still stresses me out.
Emma is not eating (which makes her cranky). Sammy is not reading (stubborn little born), Michael is teething, (so he is not sleeping).
Jeff and I are very good. We fight over who loves who more. He thinks he wins, honestly it is probably true. His job alone proves he loves me and our family.
We will be getting our Temple recommends soon and hopefully getting to do a session in the Sacramento Temple. SO very excited about that.
It has been a struggle getting here. I haven't been to the temple with Jeff since my sister Aimee was sealed to her family.
6 years or so ago. ( i think 7)
Something dies in my house. The vents system or the attic. It stinks so bad.
We avoided the heater until it go too cold, and we had to turn it on. It stunk up my whole house. I have candles burning and windows that actually have screens open.... such a pain.
but someday, all my kids will be heathly, I will be skinny, and my house won't stink.
Until then, I can just try all of the above.
why do babies cry all day long?......okay, so it is not all day, just when I need to do something.
3 comments:
A couple things...
First. I am glad you got the jogging stroller! It will be good for you. You should see if there is a park within a mile or so from your house, and MAKE yourself take the kids 3 times a week by walking there. Pack a little lunch to bring and just hang out while the boys are at school. It will be good for you, and for them! And they will love it! And you are right about the changing of the diet. It is way more expensive to eat healthy, especially if you have a big family. Maybe start with the little things, like don't have as many carb-filled stuff with dinner (rolls, rice, noodles-the cheap stuff unfortunately!) and fill in the blanks with apple slices or some other fruit or veggie. It is hard to change your big kids to that though, so start with your little ones.
Second. The smell in your house. My parents had this problem about 6 months ago. They thought it was a dead animal but they couldnt find the culprit. Finally, they realized there was a pipe broken under the house and mice were going under to the water supply and dying. It was horrible for about 2 months until they found and fixed the pipes and the mice stopped going under there. Just a thought.
Third. I am so happy for you guys going to the temple soon! It makes all the difference in the world!
Eating healthy does NOT have to be expensive! Pre-packaged convenience foods cost way more than home cooked meals. When I have lost weight in the past, the easiest thing for me was the body-for-life plan. Even if you aren't ready to jump into the workouts full throttle, commit to some kind of aerobic exercise everyday. Then committ to eating 5-6 small meals everyday. A meal is a portion (the size of your fist or palm) of protein and a portion of healthy carb (most fruit is a carb!) 2x a day add a veggie (not potato or corn, those are carbs). Drink water, no juice or soda. You will be amazed at the difference you will feel in your energy level and you will drop the weight! You can do this Katie. You are a beautiful, smart woman, and you deserve to feel good about yourself! Love ya!
~Dana
Don't EVER wish for a health issue!! Those just complicate, they don't motivate! YOU have to be your own motivation. Lame...I know, but it's the truth. You can do hard things Katie!! I believe in you :)
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