Sickness

There is a sickness going around my house.
A head cold with an unbelievably long life.
why you ask is it it lasting so long?
Because I have no washing machine.
I can not clean the linen's fast enough.
My very huge, free washing machine I got from my brother-in-law last year when we moved into this house , from which he got it free off Craig's list, ended it's life.
(it was probably miserable with the constant use)
but hey, it was free and huge...I do have 8 people wearing clothes in my house.
It was not perfect, it had a slight malfunction.
It would run a load and throw a code. EVERY TIME!!!!!
F1 right before the spin cycle.
All you had to do is hit stop and start and it would work just fine.
Well, that lasted for about a year.
As the year went on, the how many times you had to push the stop then start button (which were only 4 times at first) moved on to be 9 times before it died.
The washing machine decided it was too much.
It could not take the pressure.
It was last Tuesday, we turned it on to do a load and all the lights started to flash. (it was a very fancy washing machine)
When it stopped flashing, the light moved, and it never stayed in one spot. The washing machine would stop and start in a matter of seconds and constantly beep.
SO when I tried to unplug it and plug it back in....(i thought it would reboot it), the plug sparked at me.
Like it was cursing at me. ("don't even try with you wench!!!!")
I feel much like that washing machine.
Over worked, tired, kind of not completely right in the computer. (brain)
I throw a code once in a while and I need a stop (get control of my senses) start (start over and try again)
I feel like someday I will completely go crazy.
And maybe start cursing and someone else.
So what do I do now.
As for our family and the washing machine....
We do not have the extra money to just go buy a new one, nor do we have credit cards to use.
But, my parents have an extra one they are hoping to fix because that one is broken to. (waiting for parts)
Please, don't get me wrong, I am grateful for their generousness, but I am tired of broken washing machines.
I want a fresh, brand spanking new, red one. With a dryer to match.
One day, some day.
As for me, I am not sure what I am going to do.
I feel like I am just going through the motions of the day, of my life.
Wake up, clean, feed people, clean, get ready, go spend money on things and meals for the people I have to feed, put it away, feed people, clean, and a whole mess of more things I do for other people.
(You know, no one asked my how my Christmas was)
So how do I fix this problem?
I have no idea.
It is not like my mom has a spare broken me in her backyard, that just needs a few parts and it should, maybe, be good to go.
Until I can get a new one.
There is no getting a new me.
There is only one me.
Someday, I like me.
Someday, I wallow in all the mistakes I have made.
Some days, I am too busy to do much of anything for me.
I know I need improvement, but don't we all.
I made a list of goals to fulfil this month in my last post and I already failed.
I didn't blog on my family blog.
I didn't make the list to be seen by all on the side of my blog, like a constant reminder.
And No I did not call the doctor.
Yesterday, I had to go to my sisters and do laundry.
Because I have no washer.
I had to wait until the boys got home from school so I could have Matt watch the sick ones. (Jeff needed his uniform washed, so I HAD to go, I had to do it)
I didn't get my dishes washed, I didn't get to clean anything except my room.
(I HAD to find something of Sammy's that I lost)
And if I wasn't do that I was holding 2 sick babies. My 2 little babies that have totally gross green/yellow slime constantly coming from their noses. they are miserable so I had to comfort.
Just doing my job.
But while doing a gross job as that (sometimes it is gross when the sick ones want to give you gross snotty kisses) it only means one thing.
You end up getting sick too.
Yes, on my way home from my sisters house washing 5 loads and drying 3 ( I have a working dryer) I started to feel the ache.
The "oh crap, I know what is coming and I don't have time for this" feeling.
By the time Jeff got home at 11pm, I was done.
The little sick ones were still up watching Nick Jr., I was glued to Sammy DS, that I conveniently confiscated at bedtime, playing his DS so I didn't lose my achy sick mind.
A semi descent night of rest and I do not feel better. I need just one more nap.
No I will not get it.
I have to finish my mom job for the day.
Dinner, homework, chores, and bedtime. ( not in that order)
I sit here now, in my old ratty blue nightgown with grey leggings, red and green striped fuzzy Christmas socks, my new warm slippers, Jeff's green thermal shirt, shivering, cause I am just so cold, sinus pressure making me cranky, waiting for Nathan to finish his rough draft of his Speech that is due tomorrow so I can help him type it up, I am thinking I just need to sit on the couch and relax with Sammy's DS.
But as a mothers job is never done, I have to think of something for dinner that takes minimal effort, but yet edible to all.....
Sounds like a great night for cereal...but what will I eat. I hate cold cereal.